Cleopatra

Its not milk - but that demand is not probably far off. DD loved the bubble bath and insisted we have bubble baths "all the time mumma". She is all woman that one.

She has developed a passion for Ariel now and thinks she will be growing a tail soon and living with Sebastian "under the sea". I dont mind except that she now thinks she cant walk and "swims" along the floor of our house (mopping up the dust on the clothes in the process) and yells out "my tail my tail where is my tail"...which is not a little disconcerting.

Another thing that surprises my about my offspring (amongst the many million things) is the temper - its all sound and fury over the tiniest things..and its over so quickly am wondering if its just an act. I mean the tears are still rolling down the cheeks and the smile is already breaking and she's talking abt something else that's caught her attention. Easy she aint....had to be mine huh? Again DH will echo "name her after a warrior princess somemore, what do you expect".

We are in the midst of baking for christmas, I have decided to finally take up the mixer for the first time since getting married and make it a proper christmas with cakes etc. When I say we I mean me - with DD helping by poking her finger into everything to "check the cakes mumma". I always appreciated having a mum who baked and cooked and loved the smell of cakes baking in the house - thought DD might one day look back and think fondly of me in the same way. Knowing her we can but hope.

We are rolling out 5 types of fruit cakes (different varieties) and DD is making cookies called "Melting Moments" but since she's making it maybe it ought to be called "Meltdown Moments".

She asked why Santa cant bring the her pressie now instead of christmas since he knows she wants a 3 wheel skateboard (she sent him an email on my dad's laptop). I said he is still wrapping pressies for all the kids in the world and Mrs Santa and the elves are helping him too so its taking some time. She said "Is the Holy Ghost helping too? maybe he should help then it'll get done faster".

Possession

We gave one of DD's empty toy container boxes to my dad for him to put his bits and bobs in - DD was furious - ie limbs flailing, eyeballs protruding kind of furious - that we hadnt asked her first. We tried to convince her that we had bought a new one specially for him and altho' it looked exactly like the purple coloured container boxes she owns it wasnt in fact hers (a lie of course as it was hers).

She eyeballed us suspiciously with that "you dont fool me for minute" look she has mastered then pottered off to her room and called us in 5 mins later to view her handiwork. She had taken her little name stickers (which we got for her books) and stuck them on all her container boxes, including her bed, mirror, cupboards, toy truck, and whatever else was within her reach. She said "NOW you wont get all mixed up isnt it mumma". DH and I were on the floor laughing at which point she stuck her name sticker on my forehead and said "you also belong to me mumma" ! ......which quite frankly scared the pants off me.

I baked my first cake in our new oven over the weekend - quite an achievement considering I'd bought the oven 6 months ago and was using it as an extra workspace. Finally dragged myself down to Taman Mayang to the cake shops to get all the ingredients and tools and decided to inaugurate the oven with Mrs Fernander's trusty old butter cake - which came out brilliant.There's nothing quite like the simple butter cake is there? get that right and you've mastered the essence of cake baking I think. So many cakes nowadays taste rubbish coz people scrimp on the ingredients. Mrs Fernander was of Dutch Burgher descent from Sri Lanka who used to teach cake making and icing from her home in Bangsar for 20 years during the 70's and 80's - she's long gone now, but her recipes are still solid gold.

She taught my mum and was a real stickler for being neat and getting things just right. She herself was always immaculately dressed and accesorized. I remember going with mum a couple of times to her baking class and being in awe of Mrs Fernander. The theme of her sitting room would change every 4 months ie she had a theme for summer, autumn, winter and spring! They dont make them like that anymore do they?

Festival of Lights

The festival of lights is around the corner and again Mumma Thush has made no "palagarams" ie kuih-muih. Quite a renegade mum me, will be offering up store bought rubbish for the festive season. Divali will be muted for us this year but for DD's sake we will get out the ole sparklers and let her have a go with that.

Last year she picked up the burnt out sticks and burnt her fingers and was furious with her father - somehow blaming him for her fingers. This year am sure she will find another scapegoat for her misdeamenors. She asked us what she is getting for Divali and we told her that she will be getting a whole lot of love. She replied "I get that every day what?".

I remember as a kid getting so excited when my grandma arrived on the train from Parit Buntar with huge tins of muruku, laddu, nei-urundeh, chippies, ghee biscuits with a cherry on top and other such sweet meats for all of us in the 'city'. She usually arrived 2 weeks before Divali and lined up the tins in the 'secret place" -NOT. We would be constantly nicking into her tins the entire 2 wks and by the time the big day arrived there would just be some crumbs at the bottom of the tin. We would always have open house on Divali day between 11 and 4pm and inevitably end up fighting the effects of rain which could always be counted upon to pour just as the guests started to arrive. It was all part of the fun of Divali. Our new clothes always ended up torn and muddy before the day was thru. One Divali we hired caterers who set up stalls around our garden. The ice-kacang man was our favourite and by the end of the evening we were wearing salwar kameezes with a touch of ice kacang...actually more than a touch - a whole swirl.

The festival of lights celebrates the victory of good over evil....may all our lives always be testament to the victory of good over evil. Happy Divali to All.

Days of Yore

So DD had a blast at Saujana - probably why she's ended up with a fever now. What is with kids and fevers? It seems to be a neverending cycle, no sooner is one finished another one starts. Short of locking them up in the house forever how do we prevent this? So tiring - for the mummies that is.

So I checked out Pavillion and its not my cup of tea - other than the doughnut mecca that is JCo (check out the queues at that joint - never knew doughnuts were such a "must-have"). The general ambience is not conducive to shopping.... or is the prices? Anyway I like my malls bustling and with lots of cheap and cheerful stuff to buy. And I rue the day Parkson decided to become an upmarket joint - everything you touch there now is upwards of RM400. Remember days of yore when you could pick up underwear for Rm8 for 3 undies? And a nice blouse would only set you back max RM70? Ah those were the days.

We are off to yet another open day at one of the kindies on our shortlist - kindergardens are getting very competitive now arent they? with open days, bake sales, fun fairs etc. Definitely a new phenomenon. Back then it was a case of "you want to come - come lah, dont want, dont". Most kindies were no nonsense joints where the teachers would eyeball you if you even so much as squeaked that you wanted your mumma - but now its all "maybe you can stay with your child for the first week so they get comfortable with their new environment etc.".....anyone who knows/has kids knows that the minute you stay they are going to think you are a permanent "take-along" to kindy. Dont do it people, drop and RUN - hey it worked for my mum. I was practically pushed out of the car at the gate of Tiny Tots Kindergarden in PJ with mum giving me the look that said "you'd better behave or ELSE" and me deciding life would not be worth living unless I plastered a smile on my face and went along cheerfully. Needless to say I enjoyed kindy tremendously and never once expected mum or dad to come along with me. In fact PTA meetings were anticipated with much gloom because there would be endless dissection of how I was performing etc. with mum trying to ferret out any whiff of laziness/bad behaviour on my part and the teacher nervously insisting I was a good girl. Of course mum never believed her and presumed she was trying to "cover" for me. How different nowadays when parents dont want to hear anything negative on their kids part and actually challenge the teacher to a duel if she as much as suggests that little darling is anything less than a genius/angel.

Selamat Hari Raya

Have you noticed that the festivities are rather muted this year? Wonder why that is? To me Raya is all about excess - excess cookies, excess kuihs, excess clothes shopping and loads of open houses to visit - its part of the season and to have that toned down takes the fun out of Raya.

For DD Raya is festive enough coz Mumma and Acha get to stay at home with HER - reason enough for a major celebration - cookies and kuih muih are optional. She was asked at school what her best friend's name was and she said "Mumma" ! ........ those apron strings are never going to be cut at this rate. My dad was telling DD that when she is big she must go to Oxford University (dad hoping granddaughter will be smarter than daughter) and she nodded her head enthusiastically and said "And mumma will come with me isnt it?". I guess she intends for me to go thru life with her. Puh-leese, am sure come her first date she wont be able to get rid of me fast enough....."mumma? mumma who?".

We are checking into The Saujana (Subang) for the long weekend - just for a change of scene - too lazy to drive far away for a holiday as we plan to go to Cameron around Divali....so given mine and DD love for hotels this will be a fun break. DD actually knows the difference between a 5 star and 3 star hotel. When we stayed at Sunway Lagoon Resort she declared it to a "very nice lotel" but the 3 star on at Pangkor was declared "a smelly lotel" - so yes she has standards my girl.

A friend of mine told me her sis-in-laws belief is that you must give your daughters all the best things in life - that way they come to expect only the best and thus will only marry a man who can take care of them well to the standard they've been used to and not some down-on-his-luck sap.......dont know if I agree with that but its an interesting approach.

Happy Raya to All Of You - Good Health and Good Cheer To All.

Sandcastles

Took DD to Pangkor two weeks ago - seeing as how she has a passionate interest in working out how much sand she can fill in her swimmers before she sinks - we think we have a physicist in the making here folks. Drove up to Lumut on Friday and took the ferry across to Pangkor and stayed at the Coral Bay Resort Pangkor. So the thing about Coral Bay Resort Pangkor is this - ITS RUBBISH, and if you're thinking of staying there - DONT. There are better ways to spend your RM260 a night.
The rooms were dirty, the food was revolting - creates a new definition for the word revolting, and the facilities were so far removed from the pics in the web-site - it goes to show how little you can rely on websites and advertising. We were thoroughly dissapointed and more than a little pissed off. Further the advertised 100 metres from the beach - while accurate - was not really a beach for swimming - it was where boats were docked for picking up passengers for island boat trips - very inappropriate for swimming as it was too deep. Thankfully Pangkor island in itself is so charming it made up for the the disappointment in the accomodation and we managed to get a cab and go to a "real beach" for the better part of our holiday there. On the plus side we had the best seafood I have ever had in my entire life at Restaurant Yee Lin in Pasir Bogak. The food was so tasty I'm still having spasms thinking about it - if you are ever in Pangkor this place is a must - you will not regret it.

DD has learnt that if you build your sandcastles too near to the shore they get swept away - a lesson for us all I think.

So here's an interesting fact (am reading Crunch Time by Mike Hanley & Adrian Monck and its really scaring me) - apparently if everyone in the world were to have the same standard of living as one enjoys in downtown Europe - the earth's resources as it stands at present can only sustain 2 billion people. The current population of the world stands at 6 billlion.Doesnt that statistic scare the pants off you? We have two choices- the ones who are living it up can tone it down a little to let the 4 billion get a bit of the pie OR we can get the 4 billion to voluntarily jump off a cliff - eliminating the problem. So you gonna tell them or me? At the heart of this lies the idea of sustainability - how can we make sure we have enough to go around - and what is enough for those of us who have enough? Also can we really blame the "have nots" for loathing the "haves"?

Did you know half of the world's population live on less than US$2 a day - US$2 a day. That's less than RM6.80 a day. Now lets see what can that buy you? - A loaf of white bread costs RM1.90, a nasi lemak costs you at best RM1, a bunch of spinach from the wet market would cost you RM1, a fish would cost you (at RM9 per kilo for the cheapest fish) maybe RM3 for one fish - so that's what you'd get a loaf of bread, 1 nasi lemak, 1 fish and 1 bunch of spinach for the day - never mind clothes, rent, amenities, education, medical expenses etc. And this is what half the world's population get to enjoy every day - that's half - ie 50% - ie its just luck of the draw that you and I happen to be on this side of the 50% fence - ie OMIGOD!

Ok we all know there are poor people and we all know we are privileged - but just think about these statistics at this basic level what do we spend a day compared to what The Others get to spend a day. Its hard not to be overwhelmed by the futility of it all - and its hard to know what we can do to make any difference, its hard not to feel like bashing your head against a brick wall. But just to be aware of the statistics in itself is surely a start - a way to shake us out of our stupor - and give us perspective - RM6.80 a day - thats not a life.

"There but for the grace of God go I" - never made more sense than it does now.

Mum

My mum was the most influential person in my life, every aspect of my life was somehow influenced by mum either in accordance with her wishes or as a direct reaction against what she wanted. Everything I do, say or think is somehow related to mum and my benchmark is still "what will mum say" or "bugger! mum's gonna kill me".

Mum was a strong, feisty, temperamental, beautiful, dramatic and exciting woman. She believed in doing her best, looking her best and being the best and was continually up our backsides to do the same thing. She never accepted mediocre and always wanted to be different from the norm. She lived each day to the fullest and was constantly on the go, she believed in using every moment of the day to the max - and couldnt stand to see anyone relaxing or as she put it "whiling away god given minutes". Her temper was legendary and could strike fear in even the strongest soul - but her temper always blew over and she'd be trying to make it up to the person she yelled at by cooking for them or caring for them in some practical way.

She was a teacher for 30 years and taught in boys' schools for the most part. A lasting memory I have is of her chasing a boy around the table with her slipper and then meeting up with the same boy many years later in a restaurant. The boy is now a successful lawyer and he leapt up to greet her (of course she didnt remember him) but he mentioned the slipper incident and mum said "ah yes you were a devil, good thing I whacked you - see how well you've turned out". The ex-student meekly said "yes teacher".

She would buy breakfast for the poorer boys who came in from the estates in Port Klang too early in morning to have breakfast as she said they couldnt concentrate in her class on an empty stomach. She would buy lice medicine for those with lice and make them use it and check that they wore underpants and socks. I recall going with her to Petaling Street to buy boxes of socks and underpants for her students. Mum wasnt one for "I Love You's" but her actions spoke louder than words.

She was incredibly witty and the hours she and I used to sit at the kitchen table hooting about stuff will always be the lasting memory I have of her. She had a sense of the ridiculous and was a bit of an actress - and she used to mimic people we knew to a tee. Her expressions and turn of phrase were matchless.There was never a dull moment with mum and having her as a mum was a bit like living with a tornado. The problem with living with a tornado is that once it passes you are left with an unnatural quiet which you cant quite get used to.

Mum passed away recently from cancer - a disease that ravaged her. It left her with precious little dignity and robbed her of her greatest love - being in motion and doing things for herself. It took away her looks and her sense of humour, but she never lost her commanding presence. Even in hospital in her last days she was getting me to buy currypuffs and vadais for the nurses as she felt they were too thin. She was always lecturing them on their English and spouting out on ways in which they could better themselves. The sheer force of her will would make the doctors and nurses take direction from her rather than the other way round. She was the driving force in our family - almost like the engine for the vehicle that was our family. We are hard pressed to know how to find our way in the coming weeks, months and years, yet we must and we must do it well as mum would have wanted us to go from strength to strength rather than break down.

I take solace in the fact that her voice is so deeply etched in my mind that she will always still be our reference point. She wanted red roses and white roses at her funeral and she said we should make it a short service and "dont all of you sweat over me and wail like some bad Tamil movie - I wont have it" and "You'd all better dress well and put a smile on your faces- there's no need to look like someone has died". And that was Mum in essence, it was always about pulling yourself together and soldiering on. "Who told you life was easy, get over it and make the best of things, and stop looking like a drowned rat" was one of her favourite phrases.

Mum I love you and I will miss you till the day I die. You are so much a part of me I cant say goodbye. Rest in peace my dearest dramatic, delightful mother until we meet again.

H-A-P-P-Y

A survey has been introduced in UK schools to work out a child's "happiness barometer" by giving them quizzes to ascertain their happiness levels. My only response to this is "bollocks"! Why on earth would you need to set quizzes for 6 year olds who are notoriously mercurial anyway to figure out whether they're happy - what earthly purpose would it serve. We all know kids can be down in the depths of dumps one minute and then be happy as a lark the very next. We also know that too much navel gazing isnt good for the soul - it makes one more anal than necessary. Kids need to learn early on to snap out of it and soldier on, skills that will set them up for life.

"Nobody Knows The Troubles I've Seen. Even fewer people care"

Lets face it when asked how you are - you are expected to give a snappy cheery response not a prolongued litany of your woes because no one really wants to hear it. So too much analysis on whether or not we are happy can only lead to misery. After all happiness is fleeting you only recognise it once its gone and if you overthink whether you are or are not happy at any given moment you're sure to be miserable. Happiness doesnt stand up to scrutiny.

Am sure you'd get answers on these quizzes like "I'm not happy coz mum didnt let me watch TV for 24 hours", or "I'm so happy because I got a nintendo xx".
Can you imagine if you had such quizzes for adults at their workplace? You'd have to reword the test to "Are you feeling happy today? a. Get lost b. What the... c. Give me more money d. Yes (I'm on prozac).

We need to get kids to look outwards rather than inwards surely - the true measure of a life well spent is spending it on something that is bigger than you and will outlast you. The sooner we teach kids this the better.

Fussy

DadofFour (btw you're going to have to change the title of your blog soon), usually tags me and I ignore it coz I'm hopeless at that sort of thing, but this tag can lah - the meaning of my child's name. Since I've only got one it makes it easier to respond.
DD - Dhilshara Rao Mathew, is named after Dhilsha a 16th century moghul princess who lived in Bijapur (present day Andhra Pradesh, India). She was left to defend her kingdom after her father the king passed away -when an enemy army approached the gates of her kingdom she rode out at the head of her army and struck the leader of the enemy army right between the eyes with her bow and arrow. The enemy army fled and news of her bravery and prowess spread and no one ever attacked her kingdom again and she reigned over Bijapur bringing prosperity and peace to her kingdom. Cool eh? I read the story somewhere and thought it was a lovely name and DH liked it too because of the archery part and also in sanskrit it means Happy Heart or Happiness of the Heart - so that decided it. We added the -ra at the end to make it tie in with my name. Of course on hindsight naming her after a warrior princess was probably not the wisest thing to do - she is every bit a warrior and has delusions of grandeur and tries to command us her "slaves".

We are hunting for preschools for DD at present - and its soo difficult or are we just too fussy, when I say we I mean me of course. DH and I really believe in not sending children too early to school so we plan to send DD only next year when she turns four to preschool which means she'll get 3 years of preschool/kindy before going to Year 1 which is more than enough surely. However ever since she was 2 she has been going to Lorna Whiston one day a week and she loves that, she also goes to drama class one day a week and music class one day a week which we feel is more than enough. But am not sure if she's too bored at home, can she last another six months without going to formal preschool? What do you think? This morning she woke up and said "I want to go to school mumma" - and I felt bad for her - maybe she's just had enough of being at home while we dash off to work. Wish she could understand that one day years down the line she'll wish she had the whole day to herself to potter around and do as she wished, laze around and just be. Its a thing of the past for us isnt it but these kids still have that luxury for now but as in everything in life you never what you've got till its gone.

Info Tech And Other Oxymorons

So I've been trained on everything from risk management to financial project management to how to make a cappucino with the office cappucino machine - tho' I probably need to do a revision tutorial on the cappucino thing as I think I've blown the froth creator pipe (it made the most unusual sound much like a constipated elephant as I finished with it). I'm trained to the max - so much information at my workplace - every slideshow leads to another slideshow and there seems to be no end to it - I'm even scared to click on anything now as it opens up a huge new can of worms. The knowledge managers here sure are doing their work. Every question you have is referred to some portal which has the material for you to read - no "human" actually answers your questions - you either find it in the appropriate portal or the eSupport system or the helpdesk. Woe betide you if you still want to ask a human - they do not exist here - get over it-move on.

So tech is the mantra by which my company lives by - which again brings me back to the irony of my life. I have at every stage in my life resisted tech - I dont like it, I dont trust it yet I end up specializing in information tech law and now working in the mothership for tech based working conditions where everything is on my laptop or burned on a cd (not in my brain sadly) - hard copies are not encouraged even faxes are scanned by reception and sent to you via email. I WANT SOME PAPER PEOPLE!!!!

General point though with all this info available at the click of a tikus-are the info tech generation better informed? No bloody chance - if anything they are the most uninformed bunch of philistines - correction - tech savvy uninformed philistines. They have access to all this information but they have the attention spans of gnats and even before they finish reading one paragraph they are itching to click on another link - why? - because they can. We need to regroup and refocus - is it the mode that is important or the substance - a generation from now the question will be "what substance?" - "why is substance relevant? look at the canggih way we can access the info with version 100.2 and this new tool - surely that is the point" - errrr wrong that is not the point.

You can have the most amazing tools that turn water into wine but if your main aim isnt accessing the actual information then we have completely lost the plot. Every time I see people still in bookshops and buying books I feel exhilarated. The battle is not lost, books still have their place- information still gets tranmitted without "technology", there is hope !

Work Wallahs

So here's what I've discovered about the difference between working for a local entity and a multi national type organization - bloody a lot thats what. The international set up is soooo systems orientated and even if you want to sneeze you have to fill in some on-line request and have it circulated worldwide for approval prior to to said sneeze. Whereas at the local shindig you can pretty much sign off on multi-million dollar deals with your own pathetic little know-how and say-so and everyone will accept it. So its a learning curve for sure - am hoping it'll soon be second nature for me.

On the upside its all very organised and you've got orientations, buddy systems and mentor systems and hand-holding and how to use everything from the coffee machine to your lap top but you're expected to digest it all on the first go - and CONCENTRATE or else - they're not repeating themselves. Whereas at most local outfits you can be still prancing around 3 years later claiming you dont know how to use the photocopying machine and some poor clerk will do it for you with a smile.

Further its all work talk only at these multinationals - all very earnest people walking about looking very clever and they dont bother with you or to ask if you're new - its heads down and beavering away and talking exclusively about work work work. So no conversations about Brad and Angie's kids or Tom Cruise's control over Katie here then. They'd probably faint if I asked them if they know whether Julia Roberts has delivered yet.

On the other hand they are very helpful in terms of work - and its a real team effort - no hogging knowledge just to look good in front of the boss. No politics and sucking up to boss etc. - its all work - if you know what you're doing you're fine - if you dont you'd better find out or else you're out - no matter how much you lick the boss. Local companies? - you know the score - the bigger a licker you are the better your chances of promotion.

There's this really cool quote on the one of the walls at my new place of work "The invariable mark of wisdom is to see the miraculous in the common" - Thoreau. This is why children are so wise - common things to them are amazing and therein lies their genius and by looking at the world through their eyes we can perhaps also get a little bit of that wisdom.

Weddings

"I love people with flaws. I feel comfortable around them. I myself am made up completely of flaws stitched together with good intentions" - A. Burroughs. I love this quote - and I think that makes the difference between a halfway decent person and one who is a pain in the backside..coz the pain the backside people think they dont have a smidgen of a flaw in them and are constantly pointing out flaws in others - as if we didnt already know we have flaws. Me flawed, him flawed, her flawed, YOU flawed - get over it.

So Aish and Abhi finally did it eh? But they both look as if they sucked on an assam in the wedding photos - why so sad? A little smile wouldnt be out of place surely on what is supposed to be the happiest day of their lives. Indian brides are often told to look demure and not show off their molars at their wedding ceremony - but Aish seriously looked like someone was holding a gun to her head and Abhishek looked like his undies were on too tight. Dad-in-law appeared to be more into it than the bride and groom - who can blame him - he gets to look at the Worlds Most Beautiful Woman 24/7 from now on - old bugger is probably wishing he could have married her himself.

What is even more hootworthy is good ole Arun Nayar's dad disowning him and his bro for not letting the ole man do a drunken bhangra at the Liz-Arun wedding of the year and also suing em for not keeping in line with Hindu traditions etc. at the ceremony. Please lah - the fact that Liz and Arun have been living together for the past 4 years pretty much precludes the hindu law applying to anything anyway - let alone the minor transgressions claimed to have been perpetrated by them at their wedding ceremony. The old man is just pissed off that he wasnt given "face" at the wedding - and nothing could be more Indian than that. Liz has been introduced to the most time-honoured tradition amongst Indians - "face" and the saving thereof is the be all and the end all amongst Indians.

A friend of mine's wedding ended in her not speaking to her aunt for 10 years due to face saving mishaps - unintentional it turned out but who bothers to analyse when emotions are running high and out of control. Another friend apparently did not invite a distant relatives brother-in-law thus earning her a tongue lashing from the relative - whom she didnt even know anyway. My wedding had its share of dramas in the lead up but happily the actual festivities passed without incident...or at least if there were incidents I never heard about it - which is all that matters anyway right?

Weddings are lovely arent they - they bring out the worst in even the best of people. Wonder what will happen when DD decides to marry - though DH and I are steeling ourselves for the "Folks meet my partner we are going to be living together" - "Wedding? What wedding?" type conversation. Which may be a good thing anyway - save me from having to argue with members of my extended family. Wedding? What Wedding? My daughter is living in sin - muahahahahaHA.

Pet Cemetary

We got a fish for DD a couple of months ago -she named it Stingo (she pronounces it StinGO) but DH (predictably) suggested Nemo - so Nemo stuck. Nemo's still alive despite DD's non-commital feeding methods and loud knocking on the side of the bowl yelling "NEMO NEMO ITS ME DD - WAKE UP NEMO", Nemo's probably quietly gone potty and is in need of psychiatric care about now - but we'll never know coz he just keeps swimming round and round the damn bowl.

This is all part of DH's efforts to build up a pet repertoire to the ultimate parasite organism - a DOG ! The man will stop at nothing to get a canine in our house, my only saving grace at the moment is that we live in a condo and pets are banned.Before I go any further if you are a dog lover then offend not thy precious sensibilites and stop reading this post now. I dont have anything against DOGS! - I mean I love the Kleenex puppy as much as the next person - but an actual DOG! in our house? salivating, shedding, licking, exuding dog-fumes - I mean give me a break we already have a kid what do we need a DOG! for? I know there's a common understanding that a person who doesnt like DOGS! is not to be trusted, but trust me I'm perfectly normal and quite likeable and I dont like DOGS! - so sue me.
DH has got the little toe-rag on board as well on this and both of them are bleating away at me for a DOG! DOG! DOG!, DH even claiming the condo authorities (ie the sikh guard uncle and the malay grandpa guard) wont know we have a DOG! coz DD makes so much noise no one would hear a barking DOG!. Lets face it, I am not getting a DOG! so we need to put the gin bottle down and be practical. Further since I gave DH a child and have the scars to prove it - I think my word counts on this - NO DOG! ........wonder how much longer I can ride on those c-section scars.

DD has decided to turn into a tell-tale tit this week - is it developmental? or just another annoying inherent characteristic of my beloved offspring? She spends her time scampering from one person to the other telling on each of us with a sanctimonious tone and a holier than thou' expression. I told her not to tell tales and that nobody likes a tell-tale she looked at me and said " I dont like nobody - I want to beat nobody". There's that then.

Ode to Friends

The thing with friends is that they are reflections of ourselves arent they? At every point in my life my friends have been the icing on the cake, the sambal on the nasi, the gulab in the gulab jamun - I cant imagine how depressing life would be without them.

I dont mean the passing acquaintances whom you just say hi to and to whom you wouldnt dream of confiding the colour of your underwear to....(not that I often update my friends as to the state and colour of my undergarments - ok so maybe sometimes I do but not often) I mean those true blue die-hard friends who see you through all the crap - including your crap and are still there for you even if they sometimes want to slap you around the head for the level of crap you emanate....those are the friends I'm talking about.

I have a handful of these friends...they are all different but share one trait - they are absolutely the best, funniest, genuine people you'd have the privilege of knowing. We often never thank people who we appreciate until its too late or worse we tell X how great Y is never thinking to tell Y to her face. I'd always thought this was daft... so I intend to redress this - in writing - so you guys (and you'll know who you are by the initials) here goes.

PK you have the best smile and the biggest heart - you make me want to be a better person. The image of you explaining how to take blokes to another level in terms of a certain something over my office desk will always remain etched/seared in my brain. Your willingness to talk about anything and everything while adding your dose of common sense has been invaluable. You bring out the best in me and I trust you implicitly.

SY you are my twin of course - sadly for you. Your humour kills me - as does my own when I'm with you. You have shown me that nothing bad can get to you as long as you have a friend who empathises with you and is willing to slay the dragons for you. I admire your strength, determination and sheer bloody unwillingness to take no for an answer. You inspire me and the best compliment I can pay you is I hope your goddaughter turns out exactly like you.

SN you have overcome all obstacles in your path with such stoicism and guts and I couldnt be happier for how great your life is right now. You understand me implicitly and I'll never forget your practical ceylonese good sense during the times I needed it. Your loyalty is unparalleled and when you say "I'll be there for you" you truly mean it - you've never let me down.

SK you are always going to be the older sister I never had. You are the most non-judgemental person I know and the most patient - I'm often reminded how lacking I am in both departments when I'm with you. You have taught me so much - including how to colour code undies and keep shoes in felt bags (invaluable trust me) amongst other things. Your children are a true reflection of you and what great little people they are.

GY your generosity of spirit and willingness to help has always been appreciated. I take back what I said about you not being suited for motherhood -no one could be better suited to being a mother than you - you are a nurturer in the best possible sense of the word.

Superwomanwannabe when you and I get together and ham it up no bogeyman can get us. You are a living example of how not to take life too seriously - I am in awe of your good nature. We have chatted/hooted our way through uni, marriage, kids - I cant wait to hoot our way thru the rest of this crazy journey - thanks for the laughs.

An astrologer once told me my wealth lies in my friends - and thats about the only thing he said that was spot on correct.

Thanks ladies - be blessed.

Actually - Love Lah

If you had to explain to someone what love is - what would you say?

Prior to getting hitched I used to think that love meant being on the same wavelength, good-looks, sex appeal, understanding, humour, good-looks, sex appeal - oh wait did I already mention good looks, sex appeal....

After 5 years of marriage this is what I've discovered love is.


LOVE IS knowing how to fix the leaking toilet with tools when the bathroom starts to resemble a smelly swimming pool with suspect bits floating around.

LOVE IS having a tool box and knowing how to use it when wife is running around the house like a headless chicken and yelling that the house is falling down.

LOVE IS being able to mix different paints to get the exact same colour your wife saw of a picture of a girl's bedroom in some obscure mat salleh magazine and wants it in her girl's bedroom at home - exactly.

LOVE IS the willingness to queue up and submit your wife's extremely late EA form and endure the snide "eh eh dah sebulan lambat lah bang" from the makcik officer at the income tax department.

LOVE IS the knowledge that wife is probably going to turn out like her mum and being brave enough not to run away screaming.

LOVE IS rescuing yet another plant wife is about to kill with her green thumb and agreeing to buy plants at all given the plant murderer that wife is.

LOVE IS staying calm no matter what hysterical crap your wife throws at you even if she's insisting her hysterical crap is absolutely A1 correct.

LOVE IS making sure the car is checked, cleaned, filled up, tuned, rubbed down, hugged etc. when all your wife knows how to do is "get in the car and drive".

LOVE IS going the extra mile so that wife does not have to - coz wife is hysterical loon as mentioned earlier and needs life kept to manageable sizes otherwise she self combusts.

LOVE IS treating wife's relatives with kindness and warmth even when wife wants to fling sharp objects at wife's relatives.

LOVE IS always making wife see the big picture, take the high road, not to be petty and reminding her to make like Jesus and turn the other cheek - wife needs constant reminding.

LOVE IS - YOU sayang. Thanks for staying the course.

Pimple Fairy

DD: Aunty you dont have any pimples at all on your face.
Aunty: I know.
DD: Mumma has sooo many she can give you some if you want.
Aunty: Errr thanks.
DD: Mumma ! Give Aunty some pimples - you have so many on your face
Me: Shut up. (just kidding! I dont say shut up to DD..... I just bash her over the
head every now and then and throw her in the path of moving traffic)

DD's preschool this year has insisted that mums not come into the class with kids - but we have not been adhering to this rule strictly due to the Screaming of the Screamness that is the Screaming from the little-uns, erm did I mention the screaming? Last week the teacher - Mrs V - had enough and with a look she reserves for the most recalcitrant 3 year olds firmly ushered all the mums out of the classroom and locked the door. Good God the pandemonium ! bodies being flung forcibly against the locked door in a bid to escape one way or the other, screaming, yelling, pounding and vomiting (yes vomit provided courtesy of DD) which Mrs V. caught in her hand - good catch Mrs. V.

After about 15 minutes things quietened down and 1 1/2 hours later the kids trooped out smiling assuring their mums they loved school ! Its as if she put a spell on them - YAY Mrs. V. - Mrs V. looked like she'd been dragged through quicksand backwards and in need of a stiff drink though. Am sure the whole drama will start again this Sat. but at least we're making inroads people. Never mind the fact that all the mums sat huddled together and we practically had nervous breakdowns trying to figure who's screams belonged to which child.

But DD has told the whole world that she "went to school by my own-self" and is soo proud of her achivement. I am just relieved that she is now ready to grow beyond being a growth-on-my-body and cut the umbilical cord that makes her want to jump back in my tummy if she could and hopefully be ready for proper everyday preschool. We'll probably send her in June - get rid of the little monster for 4 hours a day - JOY! Could boarding school be far-off? ... just kidding - just.

Malborough Man

"She didnt want the type of boy who looked like he enjoyed having tea with the aunties, she wanted the Malborough Man with a Phd." This line from a book I'm reading (Inheritence of Loss - Kiran Desai) made me laugh out loud - only because this is exactly what I thought ages 16-27. From the grand vantage point of 36 (omigod -am practically an Old Aged Pensioner) I say this to all the girlies thinking along the similar vein -- its the boy who doesnt mind having tea with one damn aunty after another and the occasional mother-in-law thrown in and who can endure such torture with a general bonhomie who's going to make the better husband. The Malborough man wont be caught dead fielding your inane relatives' endless drivel...PhD or no PhD.

What Malborough Men With PhD's Wont Do:-

1. They will NOT smile encouragingly while aunties ask them whether they know so-and-so because so-and-so comes from the same state in India as them - along with a million other people.

2. They will NOT pleasantly change the subject when mad aunties demand to know how much they earn - nett.

3. They will NOT nod understandingly while aunties rattle off a litany of woes/maladies/aches and pains afflicting them.

4. They will NOT brush aside with good humour any assertions that the university they graduated from is nothing compared to Mrs XYZ's son who went to a far better university.

5. They will NOT stoically accept aunties descending upon your home at any given time and making plans to stay for the weekend and then demanding they be chauffered to all their old sick friends' houses within the 100km radius of your house.

For these fundamental reasons the boy who likes having tea with your aunties is the better bet in the long run - coz believe me there's no getting away from them aunties! Give the Malborough Man with the PhD a wide berth - its only going to end in tears.

Old -Shmold

Loved Cate Blanchett's dress at the Oscars - so right now innit. Tried to stay up and watch the whole show but frankly only the red carpet bit was worth it. Jennifer Hudson needs to take her badself down to her local Target and get a proper bra-fitting done - boob windmills are not a good look. And Ellen Degeneres is poor subsitute for my other husband ie in my parallel universe Jon Stewart...come back Jon- hearts are a pining.

Dont we love going to reunions to catch up with old friends and see how our mates have aged - only to find its as if we never left high school/uni etc. Was at my university alumni annual dinner a couple of days ago and its amazing how well everyone has aged...to tell the truth we are all looking younger now than we did 16 yrs ago when we first met as straggly haired, buck toothed teens dressed in what can only be politely termed dumpster fashion. And in the words of one friend whom I said this looking-younger-now thing too "Ohmygod I must have looked crap back then" - erm ok moving swiftly along. But really despite kids - 5 in some cases - (I hate you Shila), time and life in general - we've still got IT...and IT just got better ! well done notts. alumnus, we scrub up well dont we? More than the aesthetics - keep up the young at heart spirits - so encouraging to see we all find the same lame jokes bloody hilarious....still.

DD has decided that having five toes on each leg is just an extravagance and has asked me why she needs her little toe as Piglet and Pooh bear dont have little toes. I'm sorry but I just officially ran out of "reasons for little toes" - so I did what every self respecting mother with an unnaturally (read ridiculously) curious child does, I said "Dont be silly, be quiet and go to sleep".

Its My Party And I'll Cry If I Want To

So DD had a blast at her birthday- until the mascot arrived - then it was drama city. She completely freaked and clung to me and insisted Uncle Vicks chase it away. Which he did but the blasted thing kept coming back thinking it could win her over. WRONG. DD doesnt get won over by purple coloured burgerlookalikes with earphones on - quite frankly neither do I. I mean if you're going to have a mascot make it lah cuddly and cute - not scary and evil looking...and what is with the earphones??
But having said that some of the kids at the party loved the mascot - my nephew repeatedly hugged it to prove the point. So yes DD picker-upper of gross vermin and slithery creatures quails in the face of warm and cuddly mascot. Whats more it spoilt the cutting cake moment as all the shots we have of her are of her with a manic smile aimed at the camera but her eyeballs placed firmly to the left keeping an eye on the purple monster to see if it was coming back.

But she had fun on the whole and enjoyed the dance-y music - at one point while dancing a look of terror crossed her face and she looked at me, "Mumma my nappy's falling down", Aki (6yr old little boy full of bravado) trying to come to her rescue asked "Whats the problem DD?" She said "My nappy's fallin down", Aki backing away horrified "Uh Oh I cant handle nappy situations you gotta ask your mumma to help" - yeah yeah its always mumma innit...what about calling dad once in a while.

CNY seemed very quiet this year - other than the blasted Dragon dances which seemed to go on at every floor of our condo. I hope its chased away all the evil spirits and hobgoblins etc. coz it sure was loud enough to make me poop in my pants. The Year of the Boar is supposed to be of mixed fortune this year as it combines the water and fire elements which causes conflict. But those born in the Year of Boar are supposed to be happy, honest, trustworthy people full of courage and integrity and apparently having kids in the Year of the Boar is very fortunate...so get to it people - procreate!

Had the most delicsh tom yam goong at Basil (BangsarVillage) and excellent Sarawak Laksa at Laksa Shack at Midvalley, yes a soupy weekend for me and mine - diet be damned.

The One Where I Got A Toddler

Three years ago today I was the size of beached whale - no, make that a pregnant-with-twins beached whale and desperate for the parasite living in my tummy to be out. Much as I feared labour (when I say fear I mean sheer whitecold terror) - the idea of one more day waddling around carrying my 20 kilo protrusion was too much to bear. Fast forward 3 years and there are times I wish I could shove DD back in there if only for the peace and quiet it would afford - aah the quiet.... almost forgotten what it was like pre-child.

DD turns 3 tomorrow - and we having a party at McDonalds B-sar, the theme is ladybirds so everything from the invites to the napkins, to paper plates are ladybird themed. Dont ask why - DD is into bugs of every kind - she can pick up lizards without flinching and dangle them in my face with a "LOOK MUMMA - ITS A LIZARD" - erm yes dear but get it out of my eyeball, its licking my eyelashes. She chased a cockroach the other day assisting us in gettin rid of it but when we whacked it - repeatedly - she was close to tears saying "we supposed to CHASE it only mumma...dont beat it". Yup my luck I get the daughter who's a wildlife and pestilence fan.

DD's 3 year report:-

a.Hugs still doled out very grudgingly and that too only if we beg, weep and/or bribe. She squirms to get away from our cuddles with an admonition of "ENnough mumma/acha go away" which could damage more fragile egos than that of her father and me.
b.Loves ordering everyone about and telling them off - and has to be told constantly to use her nice voice - then she becomes sarcastically sweet. Her facial expressions crack us up especially the wide eyes and eyebrows pushed straight up to the hairline when she wants to make something seem more more-ish than it really is.
c.Still awakes at 3.30am yelling for milk and will not wait for more than a millisecond for a response of some sort before the decibel levels go up 100-fold - patience zero my little missy.
d. She often cries so much she pukes (especially when she doesnt want to sleep) so we keep a bucket nearby - the other day after puking out the contents of her dinner she looked over at me having a coughing fit and said "If you want to vomit you can share my bucket mumma". Makes it all worthwhile doesnt it.

She
May be the reason I survive
The why and wherefore I'm alive
The one I'll care for through the rough & ready years
Me, I'll take her laughter and her tears
And make them all my souvenirs
For where she goes I've got to be
The meaning of my life is - SHE.
- Elvis Costello

She is in turns delightful, dramatic, dazzling, defiant, dodgy and devious. She has turned our lives upside down, she has totally made us focus on what is important - HER. But good god do I ever recommend having kids - its the best. Happy 3rd Birthday Munchkin - Love Mumma.

Me and Valentino

14th Feb 1985, Cheltenham UK

Me 15 yrs, with a bog brush hairdo, a monobrow and legs that had never seen an epilady and yet convinced I was the coolest thing since Sheena Easton. In my trembling clammy hand an anonymous valentine card. Convinced it was from a guy named David who I thought was hunk-a-licious, I made cow eyes at him for the first 4 periods of the day. At lunch I was with my girlfriends and he came over and sat next to me ! I cannot explain the feeling of wanting to pee in my pants, my heart trying to leap out of my eyeballs and my stomach doing the cucaracha all at the same time - but thats what I felt. Then he leaned over and said "Colin sent you a valentine's card and he asks me to ask you to meet him at the music rooms after lunch". Colin? 115 pound, pimply, white the colour of kurau flesh, teeth all over the place dork and I mean DORK. End Result - HUUuumiliation. Needless to say I went no where near the music rooms that day.

14th Feb 1993, Perth Australia

Me 23 yrs - decidedly improved from the last scene - well at least I'd lost the bog brush hairdo. sitting at my desk in a law firm. Huge bouquet of flowers on my desk with a note stating "I'm smitten" - not signed. I didnt need to guess who it was from, his wife was on the phone with me accusing me of all sorts of stuff. She was completely wrong of course and I wanted to laugh but thought she might come over and rip my head open so I tried to soothe her. Told her it wasnt me her husband (our senior partner who looked like George Clooney) was after it was another lawyer - at least that was what the office gossip said. Got off the phone with her - marched into his office and handed him back his bouquet and said coldly "I think this came to me by mistake". He said "No it didnt". End Result:- Shock.

14th Feb 2002 - Petaling Jaya

Me - 32 yrs - just back from our honeymoon, legs having been epiladied within an inch of its life and sporting 2 eyebrows. Looking at DH over a candlelit dinner as he mumbled away about something. Then he said "I Love You", I said "Me Too". End Result - Mind numbing joy.

Happy Valentines All -- remember very little is needed to make a happy life.

Words

Me-"Why are you shouting?"
DD-"Because I want you to hear me"
Me-"I can hear you better when you speak quietly with your nice voice"
DD-"But I like shouting mumma coz you look at me faster"......

Best penang fried kuay teow in town? At a medan selera type thing called Ming Nien in Taman Mayang....so delish, and the wet popiah is excellent too. You can also get 25 different types of ice kacang-y type desserts - my fav being the one with durian flesh decorated all over the shaved ice - warning ! diets must be left at entrance. DH introduced me to this place when we were a-dating and we have been regulars ever since...its not fancy but its cheapandyummy. Only down side is you have cambodian/vietnamese type waiters who CANNOT.STOP.STARING.AT.YOUR.BOOBS. when you are trying to place your drink order (maybe they are still getting to grips with malay/english and are looking south for some sort of illumination). Thankfully food orders are placed directly at the particular stalls.

The life of an in-house counsel is one filled with irritation - especially from end-users (ie rest of the company) who subscribe to the "anything which has words in it is the purview of the lawyers". I asked an end user to prepare a Scope of Work/Deliverables attachment for a contract I'm preparing for him. The answer - "do you want that in words?" - no in smoke signals......git.

And I hate it when user groups accost me (especially when I'm dashing to the loo) and ask - "so how's the contract?" !!!!!
A. which contract? there is more than just one contract on my table B. its fine, vital stats are good and its in the pink of health - discharge date soon....now can I go wee.

Mera Dhil

DD has decided to write hindi movie scripts when she grows up - evidence? when I tried to extricate myself from her sweaty paws this morning to trundle off to work she said
"I want you to stay with me mumma"
Me -"But I cant be with you all the time munchikin"
DD - " but why not? I love you so much mumma".....aaaawwww yes hindi movie emotional scene right in my bedroom folks.
Bet at 13 she'll be shoving me out the door muttering "get the hell out quickly woman cant you see I have loads of dodgy suspect stuff to do before you return from work" - or as a friend of mine said at 13 all you'll hear from them is the sound of their doors slamming shut no matter what the question was from your end. I hear my dad hooting......revenge-dish best served cold - yup a doodle doo.

What is with the traffic these days lah? Any time of the day also got jam one - its getting to be a real pain. Wasnt it in Bangkok that motorists developed piles from sitting too long in jams? KL-ites cant be too far away. Soon when we rock up to get our road tax renewed we'll be given a free tube of piles ointment as standard issue.

Heard about Anna Nicole Smith's death - rumour has it that with her son and now her out of the way - who stands to gain the fortune she is supposed to be getting from her first marriage to that walking corpse billionare ? Her new husband and lawyer - makes you think.

Had to share this - NAMASTE (the greeting Indians give upon meeting someone) - means "the divine in me acknowledges and recognizes the divine in you" - how great is that ! Conveys humility, respect, tolerance and pleasure in one word - beats "hello" flat.

Pan Asians

"Information minister's call for reducing the number of Pan-Asian looking models in TV Commercials met with consternation from pan asian models" - You Dont Say. Please lah who is the info minister trying to kid, its an accepted fact that Malaysians in general think anything with a smidgen of mat salleh is superior to the hard-core original non-diluted version of any race. We can only blame our own racist tendencies for the proliferation of pan-asian models so its a bit much for clueless Info Minister to want to cut back as it were...its not the Pan-Asians fault that the public in general falls over themselves to get at the Pan Asian version - but on the other hand its a bit weird how every single pan-asian I know veers towards modelling...you dont see pan-asians beavering away at the bank/call centres/courts/hospitals etc. do you? How many pan-asian doctors do you know?

Ok I know we all say that the last thing we want to turn into is our mothers - especially when we are growing up and everything mum does appears wrong, wrong, wrong to our hormone addled brains. Well isnt it funny how the minute they hand you your first-born at the hospital you morph into - YOUR MUM. Happened to me for sure - I am now officially a clone of my mum...weird part is - I'm okay with that. Hey the woman did a damn good job raising me and if I can do the same with DD - I'm home free ! Now there's a statement I'd never have thought I'd make a couple of years ago - but its true, why? because I said so - and I'm your mother - (ok not literally but you get what I mean).

Two Sides To Every Coin

Justin Timberlake -highly overrated, not handsome, songs so so , performance blah....why all the hype. Add to that he seems to have a mother fixation and keeps dating women older than him - Cameron and now Alyssa Milano apparently - he should go back to Britney...they suited each other - mediocre teeny boppers but I guess he's not going to want to take over another man's kiddos.

What's with the War Crimes expo going on/about to go on at the PWTC? Do we need to attract unwanted attention from the US?? I think not. Just because some of the Arab countries are pumping in money into M'sia right now (think Al-R..... Bank/KFH) isnt an excuse to come over all holier than thou. War Crimes - US guilty? Most probably. Iran/Iraq guilty? Most probably. If you're going to present an expo on war crimes - try lah make it objective ....too much to ask I guess in M's..a.

DD was talking to herself yesterday and I murmured "I see", "OK" "And then?" while getting ready for bed...and she said "No no mumma dont answer me, I'm not talking to you - I'm just talking to myself" ! She has injured her leg yet again and of course the mandatory poo-bear plaster has been applied with much fussing and kissing of the offending injury - she is limping but only as when extra sympathy is needed - the limp miraculously disappears when something interesting catches her eye - then she's off like a bullet to investigate - selective limping going on with DD.

Am reading a book called Little Children by Tom Perrotta (movie is out at the moment)...quite a reflective read for all you with kids and husbands who are wondering what happened to their position as numero uno in their wife's affections. The book highlights various concerns pertinent to middle class families and our fears and hopes (bit of adultery and suspected pedophilia thrown in)...makes for good reading if not a little depressing at times.

Was having a conversation with a friend which led me to thinking how many of us can truly accept criticism from others - be it constructive or otherwise. No matter how mature/grown up we think we are I'm sure we can all safely admit that criticism sucks - BIG TIME - but a quote comes to mind - "To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing - Elbert Hubbard" I mention this only because we are always going to have some smart arse tell us how to lead our lives but we cant get too hung up on what others say - or else we'd end up doing nothing, saying nothing and being nothing....which would leave you with? - yup a big fat zero life.
So make like the duck - and let it roll of your back - and get back in the pond and paddle like crazy - and dont forget to quack loudly and joyously - even if you are just swimming in circles...arent we all?

Thumbprints

Technology - I can take it or leave it. I know its marvellous and it allows us to do untold things which we never dreamed possible a mere 1/2/5/10 years ago - but me? I can take it or leave it. Took mum to the EPF Gasing office this morning and Ms. Counter Lady produced the zippy computerised thumb print identifier gizmo with much flourish only to spend the next 15 minutes pummeling mum's thumbs this way and that trying to get a decent print on the computer. Eventually she gave up of course and produced a form stamped "Plan B" (I kid you not) and proceeded to get out the trusty ole inkpad and tissue and produced 2 excellent thumbprints from mum...goes to show - if it aint broke....

Why is it so impossible to get good mangosteens in this country - when our forefathers have been snacking on mangosteens by the gunny-full for centuries? Because the Japs are buying it up by the shiploads due to the antioxidant effects of this humble fruit. Yup they plundered pillaged and razed our country not so long ago and we now hand them our Grade A mangosteens and we the citizens of this country get to enjoy the Grade C mangosteens -how can like that one.... Grade B I hear you query? Those go to the Singaporeans.......go figure.

Darling Daugther (DD) has told her teacher she has a baby brother who is in hospital ! When asked why non-existant baby bro is in hospital she looked at her teacher and said "that's where all babies come from coz the mumma has to go there to get her tummy cut open and get the baby out" ! She's not three yet.....crumbs. Thankfully she's happy to let said baby bro live permanently in the hospital - so I dont actually have to produce one for her - yet. She insists we use the prefix Dr. when addressing her as she's going to be a doctor when she grows up so that she can "cuuttttt up people" - bit worrying the glee with which she says "cut" though.

Hugh Grant and Jemima Khan - that's a nice couple. Saw a pic of them going to some premiere and she really is very elegant. Read somewhere that there's a rumour that she and Princess Diana share a dad ie Di's mum had it off with Jemima's dad on the sly at some point and thus they are really half sisters..interesting. But am not surprised at all she couldnt hack it with Imran - life in Pakistan would have been a total shock to the system when you're a London high-society girl-y gadding about and enjoying the high life. Change of culture/religion and environment...surprised she lasted 9 years with him - good for her. But am wondering if the reason she's not marrying Hugh is because she converted to Islam to marry Imran and is still a muslim as in Islam you cant convert back - so if she were to marry Hugh - ole Hughie would have to sign-up to Islam - not something I can see Hugh "partyboy" Grant doing in a great hurry.

Anniversaire

Dear Husband (DH) and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary last Thursday (Feb 1st) - or as DH puts it 11 years together 5 of them legal ( I really dont know what he means...). Its been a fun ride so far and I'm more convinced than ever I made the right choice. We've grown so much as a couple. Funny thing is people say relationships evolve over the years and you gain a deeper understanding of your partner etc - but at the same time so much of who we are is still the same now as it was back in 1996 when we first met - which proves the point that thinking you're going to change your beloved once you marry him/her is a big fallacy and we save ourselves a lot of grief if we reconcile ourselves to accept our partners warts, big tummies and all from the beginning - or in the words of Paul Dureon "I do not put you on a pedestal or stand. I recognize you must have flaws. I just dont see them"....love it. But am still working on DH's tummy - somethings need to be nagged at and picked over like a dog with a bone (my forte).

Anyway we celebrated at The Social in Telawi 3 - superb food - I had a marinara aglio olio (sounds a bit like the chorus from some cuban musical) and DH had a lamb shank so large it cant have possibly come from a lamb - maybe a mutant lamb. Divine food and the starter of thai-style baby crab was to die for - prices very reasonable (for Bangsar that is). The drinks (cocktails for both of us) was a bit watered down but the food was brill.

So McCurry Restaurant (KL) Sdn Bhd is not allowed to use the prefix Mc as the prefix Mc is the sole and exclusive right of McDonalds Corporation - what toss. As if any sane person would ever mistake good ole fish curry and chicken peretal and hot rasam for the swill served at McDonalds. Trade Mark laws aside where's the deception or passing off etc? Big corporations and their anti-competitve spirit highlights how threatened they are by some healthy competition...why the fear? If you're a multinational giant how on earth does it hurt you if some little ole indian uncle in Jalan Ipoh KL decides (with tongue firmly in cheek) to set up a curry house with the name McCurry? - pathetic.

Its Abhishek Bachan's birthday today ! Happy Happy Abhi! Made more so happy by the fact that he's about to be hitched to Aishwarya - enough to put a smile on any man's face I guess. When asked whether he would allow her to continue acting after marriage ( this question could only have come from an Indian interviewer) he quite rightly said "its entirely up to her, her career is her own concern"....way to go Abhi - daddy obviously brought you up right - "allow her" indeed .....BAH !

Sport

Scientists at the Australian National University say that left handed people have an advantage when playing sport. This is because information is transfered more quickly across left and right hemispheres of the brain and a lefty is better at processing info across the 2 sides of the brain and they both sides of their brain to process information more effeciently than righties.

Find this hard to believe - especially the bit about sport as I am left handed and the most unco-ordinated reject when it comes to any form of sport. I'm the one in long-jump who never got into the sandpit despite an impressive run-up and leaping off the wooden bar thingy, who in volley ball when it came to my turn to serve would have my hand going in one direction and the ball falling by the way-side. Hockey always involved me swinging wildly at the ball and knee-capping fellow players while the ball dribbled merrily away. Basically I was the kid no one picked when it came to choosing teams - even loyal friends would look apologetically at me while picking someone else. Me and another fat kid would always be the last ones left and they'd still pick the fat kid over me - no offence to fat kids I did my time as one too.
From those sporting experiences I learnt to develop a thick skin and cultivate thoughts along the "sod you lah - I know I'm brilliant" vein which has served me well in all other aspects of my life since then ! Sports ? Character Forming? - I'd say.

Dont know if anyone has been following the Celebrity Big Brother Shilpa Shetty furore in the UK with shocking revelations about Jade Goody being racist. Why the shock? Jade's an uneducated, classless tart who's mother is no better - surely racism is expected. Racism in all its forms inevitably stems from ignorance and lack of education - what is shocking is that this kind of show is allowed to run especially in UK where racial tension is already at breaking point. The Big Brother phenomenon (in Australia and the UK) is quite remarkble and says more about us as a society than the actual participants - its complete drivel and its hard to believe there are people who voluntarily choose to watch this crap - isnt there some saying along the lines of people ultimately get what they deserve? Quite a damning indictment on the UK as a whole if a racist crass tart like Jade Goody is what the UK deserves.